THREE RULES TO REALLY LISTEN

You will wonder about the banality of this title considering listening as a natural reflection of man, being among the five senses that distinguish the Evolved Human Being, allowing him to interact with the World

Yet we insist! The argument should not be addressed from a physiological point of view but purely semantic

Every day we listen to everything but in the sense of '' hearing the sounds and voices around us ''… but How many times do we really listen? do we really know how to do it? in the sense that we are so willing to sacrifice our attention to really understand what ours is telling us passionate, boring, worried, talkative, wise interlocutor?

Why, in reality, Really listening implies:

BE EMPATHIC: try to '' try '' the sensations of others, recognize their super obvious emotions and moods or those more hidden between the lines out of embarrassment or shyness or pride. Understanding what lies behind or in depth helps to understand the whys of certain words. How many times do we stop at the appearance of words and react according to what we have understood? Yet the focus should be on who is speaking, to understand exactly what they are trying to say and maybe what difficulties exist behind that communication. So let's not stop at what it seems to us e enough to get nervous or slide lightly in front of the difficulty of others because we have not noticed. Let's ask one more question to come up with the reasons behind the words

BE OBSERVATORS: lread the paraverbal elements (grimaces and facial expressions, body movement and hand gestures, receding eyes or too much on, touching objects, moving improperly, ...) gives us a dramatic advantage in the process of understanding the other. The body '' betrays '' the word and immediately offers us a warm sensation on the level of purity and truth of what we hear. Have you ever noticed when someone in front of you turns '' red '' or '' purple '' or swallows or starts looking down. When does someone start crossing their arms or compulsively moving their legs or feet? Just as we notice the happiness and positive charge of others from a wonderful light of a smile or the stubbornness behind a handshake. Gestures are part of our way of being. Emphasis or lightness are inseparable traits from the very powerful words and colors of our identity

BE PARTICIPATIVE: without bothering Gaber who sang '' Freedom is participation '' but the secret of the whole thing lies precisely in this attitude: really participate in the story of others. By asking questions, experiencing first-hand the sensations of a situation that we have already experienced or that we may encounter in turn, approaching us to give comfort in case of fatigue or sadness, laughing heartily at a joke or a brilliant idea, forgetting this competitive world that asks us to `` enjoy the misfortunes of others '' in a continuous confrontation with each other. The other is a piece of us as a relative, friend, acquaintance and helping the other even if only with our sincere attention it is a way to ennoble ourselves and give meaning to our being in the world. Not only to tell about us but also to offer others one of the most beautiful gifts: listening

Therefore, Listening Really is not a physiological mechanism but a commitment that we make with ourselves to build our best version… mirroring ourselves in the other